Dear How to Do It,
My 13-year-old trans son recently told me that a friend’s mom gave him, the friend (also trans), a vibrator. I know my kid thinks his friend’s mom is generally wacky and that she does not support her son being transgender and is generally ultra-religious, so I said something like, “Wow, that surprises me, and it seems kind of intrusive to get that from your mom.” (I was actually wondering if this was some kind of don’t-be-trans thing from the mom—like, clitorises are great! Here, have a vibrator! Look! Fun! I had no idea where this conversation was going.)
Philosophically, I see nothing wrong with you buying your 13-year-old son a sex toy, as he will be masturbating anyway. Just as you wouldn’t try to stop a fish from swimming or a bird from flying, so should you not attempt to impede a teenager from masturbating. By providing a vibrator, you are not merely being sex-positive; you’re fostering efficiency. That is good parenting, if you ask me.